Well, I've spent alot of time this last week in conversation with other believers. To me, I see this as an answer to prayer; a way to sort through my thoughts and beliefs and also bring some new ones into perspective. Previously, I had blogged about "Who am I?" and surprisingly enough, this came up in a conversation with one of my best friends.
I was looking at the question all wrong. It's not "who am I?" but rather, "Who is God?" A verse in Genesis was what lead me to consider this question change.
So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. (Genesis 1:27 NIV)
We were created in God's own image. Created with the intent that we would strive to follow in God's footsteps. So instead of going on a self fulfilling journey of finding out who I really am, I have decided to go on a God fulfilling journey of noticing His characteristics in each peice of scripture that I read. Alot of people may say, "Oh, I do this all the time." and I was one of those people before this week. However, we each cling to our own characteristic of God. Be it that He is loving, compassionate, merciful, jealous, ect... We each see God as mainly one thing. In my conversation with my bestie, she brought up that to come even a little bit closer to understanding who God is, we need to expand our horizons and search for all of the different characteristics of God. He is so complex and diverse and so often we forget about that by putting him in a specific box.
This leads me to the next part of the conversation that I had with my friend. So we strive to become closer to God. For what reason though? Is the ultimate goal to be that my relationship with God will benefit me, giving me the change at eternal life? No. While that will be a side effect of the ultimate goal, it is not the sole purpose of God wanting a relationship with us.
I see it in the picture of a waterfall which empties into a fast flowing river. Bear with me for a second and just picture that in your mind. Alright, see it? Now I will explain...
The area at the bottom of the water fall represents me (or you if you are putting this in terms of yourself). The actual waterfall represents God, who pours into you both love and forgiveness. The river that flows out from the bottom of the waterfall (remember, the bottom is you) is everyone else that you come into contact with. Do you see it yet? If the waterfall were to stop pouring into the bottom of the waterfall, all of the remaining water would flow to the river, but the bottom would dry up. Eventually there would be no more water running anywhere. God pours into us, much like the water fall, allowing us to wallow in his love and forgiveness for a time and then sending it off to everyone else that we come in contact with. It is a cycle in which it is God who is reaching to others, but by going through you.
So looking at this picture, it became clear to me that my relationship with God is not about me, but rather it is about God working through me to reach others. In the end, I will not be the only one to benefit, and I find that incredibly refreshing. When I remember this, I have motivation to spend the time in God's word and in Prayer, allowing God to pour into me so that I will have the oppertunity to be a vessel to others. It's a new perspective; one that pulls any selfish part out of my relationship with God. I want to make sure that I never forget that third party and that I will always remember that those around me could use a touch of God's "waterfall". I am His servant and I will allow Him to work through me in any way He chooses.
Wednesday, July 31, 2013
Monday, July 22, 2013
An Excerpt from My Heart
July 20th, 2013
Who am I? I feel as though I have all of this creativity wrapped up in myself. Dance, music, art, writing... Where do I go with it all? I love learning and school, but it is hard to balance everything.
Lately, I've been so bitter and frustrated with the world. It's become so easy to let my emotions get the best of me. I know that I won't make it unless I turn to God. he is my stability; the one thing that I can always count on. Even with that stability, though, I am always under attack. From all angles come the questions... the accusations... This makes me realize that no matter how much I know, I will always need to ask God for the right words to say in every situation. No matter where I am at, I am a missionary, sent on a mission from God. And man, I have so many people who I would love to see meet God by allowing Him to work through me!
So now, just as Paul came and was to all people what they needed him to be, how do I become what is needed? Is it possible that I already am what is needed in the places God is sending me? Has He prepared me in this way already?
WHO AM I?
"Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling and slander, ALONG WITH EVERY FORM OF MALICE. BE KIND AND COMPASSIONATE to one another, forgiving eachother, just as in Christ, God forgave you.
Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and LIVE A LIFE OF LOVE, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God."
-Ephesians 4:31-32 and 5:1-2.
Who am I? I feel as though I have all of this creativity wrapped up in myself. Dance, music, art, writing... Where do I go with it all? I love learning and school, but it is hard to balance everything.
Lately, I've been so bitter and frustrated with the world. It's become so easy to let my emotions get the best of me. I know that I won't make it unless I turn to God. he is my stability; the one thing that I can always count on. Even with that stability, though, I am always under attack. From all angles come the questions... the accusations... This makes me realize that no matter how much I know, I will always need to ask God for the right words to say in every situation. No matter where I am at, I am a missionary, sent on a mission from God. And man, I have so many people who I would love to see meet God by allowing Him to work through me!
So now, just as Paul came and was to all people what they needed him to be, how do I become what is needed? Is it possible that I already am what is needed in the places God is sending me? Has He prepared me in this way already?
WHO AM I?
"Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling and slander, ALONG WITH EVERY FORM OF MALICE. BE KIND AND COMPASSIONATE to one another, forgiving eachother, just as in Christ, God forgave you.
Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and LIVE A LIFE OF LOVE, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God."
-Ephesians 4:31-32 and 5:1-2.
Sunday, May 12, 2013
Wrestling with Hatred
Hatred is a touchy subject, however, after today, I believe it is something that I want to take some time and focus on. The Bible presents an interesting view of hatred, providing two different perspectives. As followers of Christ, we are told in the first part of Psalm 97: 10, "You who love the LORD, hate evil!" Taking this verse at face value, it seems as though we are to be angry with every injust thing that occurs, but how do we separate hating the person who is preforming the injustice and hating the injustice? 1 John 2:9 makes it very clear that "whoever says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness." These two verses at first seem to be in conflict, however it is a solvable conflict. God does not call me to hate the one causing any kind of injustice. Rather, we are to love that person, separating them from the injustice and through this, perhaps be able to present an alternative to the person from a loving standpoint.
I can't say that this is an easy step for me to take. Until recently, I had rarely been confronted with any feeling of hatred, but now that I have felt it, I understand how important it is to reign in hatred and prevent it from clouding my judgment and controlling my decisions. Personally, I see a combination of Psalm 97: 10 and
1 John 2:9 to be the solution to keeping hatred and anger reigned in. Rather than approaching a person while engulfed in anger, I need to look at that person who has fallen off of the narrow path, with the want to help them return to God. Through that, perhaps the person will focus on the love that you are extending to them and take the time to listen to your opinion on whatever it is they are doing. Without respect and love, no injustice will be solved.
Of course, people are not perfect and this may not always work. In that case, I am realizing that it is always up to God to change hearts, leaving us with the oppertunity to pray without ceasing.
I don't expect everyone to agree with this as every situation is different and requires unique attitudes. For me, however, this is what God is teaching me.
I can't say that this is an easy step for me to take. Until recently, I had rarely been confronted with any feeling of hatred, but now that I have felt it, I understand how important it is to reign in hatred and prevent it from clouding my judgment and controlling my decisions. Personally, I see a combination of Psalm 97: 10 and
1 John 2:9 to be the solution to keeping hatred and anger reigned in. Rather than approaching a person while engulfed in anger, I need to look at that person who has fallen off of the narrow path, with the want to help them return to God. Through that, perhaps the person will focus on the love that you are extending to them and take the time to listen to your opinion on whatever it is they are doing. Without respect and love, no injustice will be solved.
Of course, people are not perfect and this may not always work. In that case, I am realizing that it is always up to God to change hearts, leaving us with the oppertunity to pray without ceasing.
I don't expect everyone to agree with this as every situation is different and requires unique attitudes. For me, however, this is what God is teaching me.
Monday, April 29, 2013
Passing Grade
With it being the end of a university semester, the majority of students have their minds focused on two main things; their marks and summer! I was blessed with the oppertunity to return to church for the first time in forever on Sunday, and of course, God was just waiting to reveal new things to me.
I like to say that I am a student that strives for excellence. Over the years I have worked to find a balance between excelling in school and excelling in friendships. But on Sunday, I was confronted with the fact that over the last 8 months, I have only been living life with a "passing grade." My spiritual life has consisted of doing what I saw as the bare minimum to achieve eternal life but I didn't realize that until yesterday. The thought that I haven't been striving to excel in my walk with God sickens me. After all, in Revelation 3:15-16, the Bible says "I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth." I have become lukewarm this year and that isn't what I want.
Luckily for me, I am subject to the Grace of God. I can never be separated from His love...
"28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who[a] have been called according to his purpose. 29 For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. 30 And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.
31 What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? 33 Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. 34 Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? 36 As it is written:
37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
-Romans 8:28-39
In response to this, I want to live a life of excellence. Striving to be on fire in my relationship with God. For this reason...
" I will dare to live with purpose and passion.
I will dare to live with excellence and commitment.
I will do the very best to be the best ME I can be.
I will ahve the courage to be one of the few!"
-Joyce Meyer
I like to say that I am a student that strives for excellence. Over the years I have worked to find a balance between excelling in school and excelling in friendships. But on Sunday, I was confronted with the fact that over the last 8 months, I have only been living life with a "passing grade." My spiritual life has consisted of doing what I saw as the bare minimum to achieve eternal life but I didn't realize that until yesterday. The thought that I haven't been striving to excel in my walk with God sickens me. After all, in Revelation 3:15-16, the Bible says "I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth." I have become lukewarm this year and that isn't what I want.
Luckily for me, I am subject to the Grace of God. I can never be separated from His love...
"28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who[a] have been called according to his purpose. 29 For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. 30 And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.
31 What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? 33 Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. 34 Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? 36 As it is written:
“For your sake we face death all day long;
we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”
we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”
-Romans 8:28-39
In response to this, I want to live a life of excellence. Striving to be on fire in my relationship with God. For this reason...
" I will dare to live with purpose and passion.
I will dare to live with excellence and commitment.
I will do the very best to be the best ME I can be.
I will ahve the courage to be one of the few!"
-Joyce Meyer
Friday, April 26, 2013
Powerful with a Purpose
Here I am... 1:30 AM, unable to sleep... Back in September, I had a night just like this one. It was my first night away from home and I was afraid of what I had gotten myself into, moving to Saskatoon for university. Tonight, however, I am afraid of leaving all of this. My heart aches for all of the goodbyes that are sure to come in the following morning. But as I allow these tears to roll down my face, I take a moment to look back on the year. I look at where I am now and where I was in September. Flipping through my journal, I find one of the very first entries from here in Saskatoon...
"Who am I going to be? God, I have a choice. I live in a secular world now. How am I going to portray myself? More importantly, how will I portray you? I want to be a woman of God. A woman who shows the fruits of the spirit to everyone around her. I want to be the one who people see you in. But, I also feel the human need to be accepted and that is going to pull me onto the wide path. God, only you can transform. Only you can give the fruit of the spirit. Come and fill me God. I know that you have me here for a reason, you placed me at Sheps. So I need to trust that you will continue to open doors. To place people in my life with whom I can share your light. God, help me to be different, to stand up for what I know is right."(September 6, 2012)
I'm not perfect. I've screwed up this year, and I will be the first to admit that. I have no regrets though.This has been a year in which God uprooted me fully from every familiar thing and placed me in an alien setting. I have been a missionary, called to love those God has placed in my life. And let me tell you, I wouldn't trade it for the world. As I look back at that September 6th entry, I realize that God gave me everything I asked for. He delivered and I cannot complain in anyway about that. I have been so blessed, and as I leave this place for the next four months, I am sad but I know that God isn't done with me yet.
So here I am; Powerful with a Purpose. Lord, send me.
"Who am I going to be? God, I have a choice. I live in a secular world now. How am I going to portray myself? More importantly, how will I portray you? I want to be a woman of God. A woman who shows the fruits of the spirit to everyone around her. I want to be the one who people see you in. But, I also feel the human need to be accepted and that is going to pull me onto the wide path. God, only you can transform. Only you can give the fruit of the spirit. Come and fill me God. I know that you have me here for a reason, you placed me at Sheps. So I need to trust that you will continue to open doors. To place people in my life with whom I can share your light. God, help me to be different, to stand up for what I know is right."(September 6, 2012)
I'm not perfect. I've screwed up this year, and I will be the first to admit that. I have no regrets though.This has been a year in which God uprooted me fully from every familiar thing and placed me in an alien setting. I have been a missionary, called to love those God has placed in my life. And let me tell you, I wouldn't trade it for the world. As I look back at that September 6th entry, I realize that God gave me everything I asked for. He delivered and I cannot complain in anyway about that. I have been so blessed, and as I leave this place for the next four months, I am sad but I know that God isn't done with me yet.
So here I am; Powerful with a Purpose. Lord, send me.
Saturday, April 13, 2013
Laying it all at His Feet
It's that time of the semester... Finals seems to have creeped up on me and brought with it the different stresses and anxieties of life. I had an interesting conversation with one of my friends the other day about how God asks us to cast all of our anxieties and cares upon Him. Ok, I can do that right? I mean, who wouldn't want to give up all of their problems to someone who could handle them better than we can ourselves? Well, I was reminded in this conversation that God doesn't just want our problems. He wants us to give up those things we grasp so tightly to... Whether that be our family, our friends, our jobs, or anything that we have gained over the years. That includes our own dreams and hopes as well. Many people, me included, tend to hold these things so close to us because we are afraid that if we give them to God, He will take them away. I believe that this is not God's plan. If the thing we grasped so tightly wasn't good for us, then yes, He probably would take it away, putting us in a better position than we were before. But if this thing was good, I believe that He will take it and mold into something greater. After all, God can do so much more with something than we could ever even imagine ourselves doing! So, although it is a scary concept, giving up those situations and people that are so dear to my heart, I am making a point during this finals season and continuing into the future to place all of my cares, hopes, loves, and dreams at the feet of my Creator, with the intent of allowing him to make me and my life into something even greater than already is.
Sunday, March 24, 2013
The Waiting Game
This week has been a week of waiting. Waiting for the sun to come out, waiting for a huge life altering exam on Saturday, and most importantly, waiting for God's voice to become clear on a number of things. It has been a week of trying to find moments of peace and calm where I could sit and reflect. Today, as I have begun to recognize God's hand in specific areas of my life, I am so thankful that I have a God who wants control of my life. I returned to a passage which I hadn't read in a very long time, Jeremiah 29:11-14.
I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.
When you call on me, when you come and pray to me, I’ll listen.
When you come looking for me, you’ll find me.
Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I’ll make sure you won’t be disappointed.
As I sit and let this truth wash over me, I find that place of peace. God is always speaking to me, his voice always there. When I ask, he will answer in some way. So as I wait again this upcoming week, I know that I can wait in the peace that comes with the understanding that I have an all powerful God who has control of my life. He will open and close doors as I wait for him.
I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.
When you call on me, when you come and pray to me, I’ll listen.
When you come looking for me, you’ll find me.
Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I’ll make sure you won’t be disappointed.
As I sit and let this truth wash over me, I find that place of peace. God is always speaking to me, his voice always there. When I ask, he will answer in some way. So as I wait again this upcoming week, I know that I can wait in the peace that comes with the understanding that I have an all powerful God who has control of my life. He will open and close doors as I wait for him.
Thursday, March 21, 2013
Spring Cleaning: Both Inside and Out.
"Create in me a pure heart, O God,
and renew a steadfast spirit within me."
-Psalm 51:10
Despite the massive amounts of snow piled up outside of my residence, SPRING HAS SPRUNG! Yes, this is a cause for celebration... It is also a cause to pull out the vaccuum and clear out the dust that settled in all those hidden corners during the cold months of winter. As I was doing some rearranging in my room this morning, I realized that I need to do some Spring cleaning in my spiritual life as well. University life doesn't make it easy to keep priorities straight... I've messed up big this year with friendships, time management, and most importantly, my relationship with God. As I look at my previous blog posts, I see a girl who was so on fire for her Creator. She wanted to share it with the world. Everyday she would search for new ways that God was speaking to her. Now, those areas have gathered dust and it's time that I cleaned them out and let them shine again. :)
Psalm 5:10 is a plea from David, asking God to completely renew him. I don't know about you, but I could certainly use some renewing these days. This is why, as of today, I am asking God to help me with my spring cleaning. I'll handle the physical cleaning of my room, but I know that I am going to need his assistance in cleaning up my relationship with Him. Luckily for me, God is merciful. He doesn't look at the mistakes I have made these past 7 months; rather He looks at the fact that I am coming to Him with the knowledge that I need Him to make me whole again.
So as we all embark on this new season, take a moment to think about the areas in your life that you have let get filled with dust and cobwebs. Guaranteed, you have at least one place. Make it a spring goal to clean that area out with the help of your Creator! Spring is a time for new beginnings, so what better time to find a new beginning for yourself!
and renew a steadfast spirit within me."
-Psalm 51:10
Despite the massive amounts of snow piled up outside of my residence, SPRING HAS SPRUNG! Yes, this is a cause for celebration... It is also a cause to pull out the vaccuum and clear out the dust that settled in all those hidden corners during the cold months of winter. As I was doing some rearranging in my room this morning, I realized that I need to do some Spring cleaning in my spiritual life as well. University life doesn't make it easy to keep priorities straight... I've messed up big this year with friendships, time management, and most importantly, my relationship with God. As I look at my previous blog posts, I see a girl who was so on fire for her Creator. She wanted to share it with the world. Everyday she would search for new ways that God was speaking to her. Now, those areas have gathered dust and it's time that I cleaned them out and let them shine again. :)
Psalm 5:10 is a plea from David, asking God to completely renew him. I don't know about you, but I could certainly use some renewing these days. This is why, as of today, I am asking God to help me with my spring cleaning. I'll handle the physical cleaning of my room, but I know that I am going to need his assistance in cleaning up my relationship with Him. Luckily for me, God is merciful. He doesn't look at the mistakes I have made these past 7 months; rather He looks at the fact that I am coming to Him with the knowledge that I need Him to make me whole again.
So as we all embark on this new season, take a moment to think about the areas in your life that you have let get filled with dust and cobwebs. Guaranteed, you have at least one place. Make it a spring goal to clean that area out with the help of your Creator! Spring is a time for new beginnings, so what better time to find a new beginning for yourself!
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